A tool to quieten your limiting beliefs.
Are you tired of the limiting stories that run on repeat in your head?
Limiting beliefs. Those pesky internal voices that get louder and louder, the more you challenge yourself.
Firstly, if you think that you are the only one with them, believe me, you are not alone. We all have them.
In my coaching room, I regularly work with people holding themselves back from their full potential because of stories running on loop in their minds.
Letโs start with the factsโฆ.
To break free from limiting beliefs, we first need to understand why they exist:
Limiting beliefs are the stories we tell ourselves over and over to keep ourselves safe and "out of danger".
Your brain is working hard to keep you safeโฆ but in a primitive sense. It cannot differentiate between a bear chasing you and a presentation you have to deliver.
Behind a limiting belief is a fear. A fear of being seen, a fear of getting it wrong, a fear of feeling fear, a fear of being judged.... The list goes on. Understanding the fear, can help you understand the origin of the stories you play over in your head.
When your brain senses fear, it switches into alert mode and pushes you back into your cosy comfort zone. But was it really a dangerous situation? Unlikely!
Limiting beliefs become like a track stuck on repeat. This is because the more you play them, the more your brain assumes they are true. The volume and intensity gets louder and louder and suddenly, these beliefs are in charge and you are hidden away.
Everyone has limiting beliefs, no matter how confident and assured they appear. They might just have better control of the volume dial on their stories. This is actually a reminder for you, that you can get to a place of being in control too, with some work.
Makes sense in theory, now how do I spot mine?
For most of us, they are all too familiar as these stories run in our heads over and over.
Limiting beliefs tend to be fixed, rigid statements, not grounded in fact. They feel judgmental and like you are being put in a box, because that is their exact goal.
Common limiting beliefs include (and are absolutely not limited to):
โI am not ready yet.โ
โThat is just the way I am. I can never change.โ
โI'm not good enough / smart enough / talented enough.โ
โI'm just naturally bad at ______.โ
โI am just an ___ person.โ
โI donโt deserve ___.โ
The good news? Limiting beliefs are not facts.
They are stories that run in our heads to keep us safe. But given that there is usually no real threat to life, we can quieten them.
You can get in control of your stories so that they no longer hold you back from your potential.
Here is a quick tool that I have been using in my coaching room to understand and reframe your limiting beliefs whenever they pop up. Grab a pen and paper and create a table with three headings; 1. Limiting Belief, 2. Real-Life Facts & 3. Instead, I Will Tell Myself.
Here is an example to get you started:
1. Limiting Belief
โI am not ready yet.โ
2. Real-Life Facts
I have already achieved X, Y, Z.
My friends and colleagues tell me that I would be amazing at this.
I tackled a similar challenge successfully in the past.
3. Instead, I Will Tell Myself
โI am brave enough to try.โ
โThe risk is worth the rewards.โ
โI am ready enough now."
Remember: You the goal is not to eliminate the fear entirely, you just need to stop letting it make your decisions for you. It takes practice, learning, and more practice. There is no failure here! Even by catching your limiting beliefs and recognising they are not facts. You are already taking a big step towards getting in control.
Your Experiment For This Week
Pick one limiting belief that has been buzzing in your head lately that you would like to take control of.
Grab some paper, draw out your 3 columns and work through these 3 questions:
What is the exact belief?
What are the real-life facts that prove this belief wrong?
What empowering statement will I tell myself instead?
Once you have your table filled, choose one โInstead, I Willโ statement that you would like to try out.
Your Challenge?
โ Every time your limiting belief comes up, stop and notice it, remind yourself that it is not fact, then challenge yourself to replace it with your โInstead, I Willโ commitment.
Join the next workshop to work through your limiting beliefs, in a community of like-minded people.
Every month, I open my calendar to invite my community in for a free online workshop, focused on the topic that is bubbling through in my coaching room.
This workshop is free of charge, online and only 60 minutes long.
You will leave with greater clarity on your challenge, a toolkit to apply the next time your fears hit and most importantly, feeling less alone.
